Sunday, July 08, 2007

Single Reviews 09/07/07

Good Lord! What on Earth are you reading this for? Is it really appropriate for you to be sat there with your computer on? No doubt you’ve got some sort of electricity-powered illumination too, eh? Shocking. Just shocking. Did a bunch of strippers singing “loosen up my buttons” to an indifferent audience not teach you ANYTHING about saving the planet? Tut-tut. Well, if you’re gonna burn the Earth, we’re glad you chose to do it in style. Behold the Single Reviews

Thankfully putting the Smashing Pumpkins Tribute Band schtick on a back burner, My Chemical Romance unleash the frenetic, melody-severe Teenagers. Certainly no bad effort, but where this fits in on a concept album of a cancer patient on a bleak journey through the afterlife, we can’t quite calculate. We could listen to the album and find out, but that would mean… well, listening to a My Chemical Romance album.

Leaky-crotched, banshee-voiced, methadone-addled, hip-hop harpy Fergie decides to chill out somewhat on Big Girls Don’t Cry, which you’d imagine is a blessed relief after three self-indulgent uptempo monstrosities. But against all odds, having decided we quite like the Glamorous “if you ain’t got no money, take your broke ass home” lyric, this is just seven shades of beige.

Next up, a heavy dose of futile, ranty cod-house crap, apparently called Bigger Than Big, courtesy of Super Mal featuring Luciana. Ah yes, the same Luciana that brought us the excruciating Yeah Yeah. Love, even Saffron from Republica couldn’t forge a career out of being Saffron from Republica. A decade on, that shit ain’t going to wash with anyone. Now piss off and get yourself a desk job.

Finally, rescuing this week’s reviews from being entirely atrocious are Travis, who claim our Single of the Week with the joint-best track from their quietly-astounding album The Boy With No Name (an incredibly well-written review of which is located here). Energetic, playful, charming and boasting an effective nod to Iggy Pop, it could in fact be one of the greatest tracks of their entire catalogue. Woo-hoo, go Travis, etc etc.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

I miss you like a child misses her blanket.

This song is super annoying :) But I can't turn away.

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