Let’s all take a moment, prior to this week’s Single Reviews, to wish Cheryl Cole a speedy recovery from her NEAR-DEATH experience. Of course, malaria is no laughing matter, but in the hands of the gutter press, it’s become unintentional comedy gold. Almost as funny as her heated affair with 100% HETEROSEXUAL BALLROOM DANCER Derek Hough. Arf.
We start things off with
Adam Lambert, and the Pink-penned grrrl-ballad
Whataya Want From Me. Carrying such an immediate, identifiable Max Martin sound makes it far from original, but Lambert's impressive aptitude for gut-wrenching breathes new life into the formula, and cements that his forte lies in emotional, intelligent pop-rock rather than glittery vaudeville electro.
And at the other end of the scale, a band who’ve taken themselves far too seriously finally allowing their pop sensibilities to awaken.
30 Seconds To Mars embark on a smartly-riotous, characteristically-epic emo voyage for
Closer to the Edge, but on this occasion, they’ve packed themselves a few space-age twiddles and a refreshing dose of modesty. More of the same, please. Kthnxbai.
Single of the Week is awarded this week to
Pendulum. The willowy, wistful intro to
Witchcraft is – perhaps unsurprisingly – a red herring, soon lambasted by a violent, stampeding instrumental and unstoppable chorus. The intrepid fusion of moshpit and dancefloor could have all gone so horribly, horribly wrong, but
Witchcraft further verifies they’ve knocked it out of the park.
Finally, a joke which was never funny in the first place can easily reach 'excruciating' when told again and again. Demonstrating the point are
Jedward, whose futile cover of Blink 182's
All The Small Things is entirely devoid of a single positive and only serves to fully cement them as utter, utter fuckwits. Roadkill scooped off a motorway and given a record deal would have more relevance, more charm and significantly more talent.
We start things off with Adam Lambert, and the Pink-penned grrrl-ballad Whataya Want From Me. Carrying such an immediate, identifiable Max Martin sound makes it far from original, but Lambert's impressive aptitude for gut-wrenching breathes new life into the formula, and cements that his forte lies in emotional, intelligent pop-rock rather than glittery vaudeville electro.
And at the other end of the scale, a band who’ve taken themselves far too seriously finally allowing their pop sensibilities to awaken. 30 Seconds To Mars embark on a smartly-riotous, characteristically-epic emo voyage for Closer to the Edge, but on this occasion, they’ve packed themselves a few space-age twiddles and a refreshing dose of modesty. More of the same, please. Kthnxbai.
Single of the Week is awarded this week to Pendulum. The willowy, wistful intro to Witchcraft is – perhaps unsurprisingly – a red herring, soon lambasted by a violent, stampeding instrumental and unstoppable chorus. The intrepid fusion of moshpit and dancefloor could have all gone so horribly, horribly wrong, but Witchcraft further verifies they’ve knocked it out of the park.
Finally, a joke which was never funny in the first place can easily reach 'excruciating' when told again and again. Demonstrating the point are Jedward, whose futile cover of Blink 182's All The Small Things is entirely devoid of a single positive and only serves to fully cement them as utter, utter fuckwits. Roadkill scooped off a motorway and given a record deal would have more relevance, more charm and significantly more talent. 
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