On a week which saw the world wholly enamoured by the joyous news of the Chilean miners being rescued, it’s ironic that the Single Reviews this week boasts three of the most depressing, miserable songs of the year thus far. Mind you, it’s quite nice that there’s at least a theme running through proceedings – how often does that opportunity come around? Time to get your Eeyore on...
Following a rather impressive debut – in terms of both quality and chart performance – mismatched fangirl trainwreck
The Wanted fizzle into their rightful place as a smudged footnote in the history of forgettable boybands with the piss-weak
Heart Vacancy. Of course, an overly gooey, smooshy love song is never going to blow the doors off the place, but it
can be done with character, individuality and conviction. This, however, is just a really,
really bad example of pop music. To the dumper with you!
Christina Aguilera’s ongoing journey into total irrelevance continues with the comatose ballad
You Lost Me. Kudos to Xtina for convincing an artist as talented as Sia to sully her track record by co-writing this bilge, but attempting to mimic Sia’s voice – one of the most unique and incomparable of her generation – is an even stupider a mistake than
Keeps Getting Better. Still, it’s a marked improvement from the outrageously bad
Not Myself Tonight.
And, as if to totally come across as NME-tastic muso wankers,
Single of the Week is awarded to a demi-obscure indie band immediately after slagging off two pop acts. However, it’s merely a coincidence that
Little Comets have provided a rough-cut, unprocessed, almost-industrial rock sonnet in the form of
Isles. It’s pretty bleak stuff, admittedly, but in an intentional, very human manner. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re off to pop a Prozac or five...
Following a rather impressive debut – in terms of both quality and chart performance – mismatched fangirl trainwreck The Wanted fizzle into their rightful place as a smudged footnote in the history of forgettable boybands with the piss-weak Heart Vacancy. Of course, an overly gooey, smooshy love song is never going to blow the doors off the place, but it can be done with character, individuality and conviction. This, however, is just a really, really bad example of pop music. To the dumper with you!
Christina Aguilera’s ongoing journey into total irrelevance continues with the comatose ballad You Lost Me. Kudos to Xtina for convincing an artist as talented as Sia to sully her track record by co-writing this bilge, but attempting to mimic Sia’s voice – one of the most unique and incomparable of her generation – is an even stupider a mistake than Keeps Getting Better. Still, it’s a marked improvement from the outrageously bad Not Myself Tonight.
And, as if to totally come across as NME-tastic muso wankers, Single of the Week is awarded to a demi-obscure indie band immediately after slagging off two pop acts. However, it’s merely a coincidence that Little Comets have provided a rough-cut, unprocessed, almost-industrial rock sonnet in the form of Isles. It’s pretty bleak stuff, admittedly, but in an intentional, very human manner. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re off to pop a Prozac or five...
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