Honking Box Preview: Michelle & Andy's Big Day

Celebrity weddings are always worth a through-the-fingers glance, eh? From Jordan’s preposterous pink atrocity of a dress, to David and Liza engulfing each other’s skulls, the British public thrives on the crassness of all-star matrimonials and their endearingly OTT lunacy.

So imagine our delight to learn that ITV2 have captured one of these examples of uber-folly in Michelle & Andy’s Big Day. As the name on the tin suggests, the show records the nuptials of serial career malfunctionee and resultantly the world’s greatest sport, Andy Scott-Lee, and the adorable Michelle Heaton of Liberty X, whose eminent label as one of our favourite Geordies has caused some unrest amongst certain friends in the North East (though let the record show that Spuggie will always hold a place in our hearts).

While we’re in no doubt that the key pleasure of Totally Scott-Lee was the nefarious hilarity known as Roseann McBride, a significant number of belly laughs came courtesy of Lisa herself, and her vengeful odium towards Michelle. Quite why the High Priestess of the Car Crash has such a burning hate for a genuine sweetheart is bewildering, but Michelle’s ability to remain entirely unbothered only upped the laughs – nothing can rival loathing like a mere shoulder shrug. For this reason, we’re secretly hoping for a mid-service explosion of bile from Lisa, a la the Tragedy video.

In seriousness, The Sloppy Dog wishes the happy couple all the best, but should things go the way of Jen & Brad / Harvey & Alesha / Nick & Jessica / Buffy & Angel / Tom & Katie, at least we can revel in the merriment captured here long after the divorce.

But, y’know, all the best. Seriously.