Saturday, August 01, 2009

Single Reviews 03/10/09

Happy Birthday to us! Happy Birthday to us, etc etc. Well, sort of birthday... this is The Sloppy Dog’s 300th post, would you believe? And to celebrate, you can now use our fancy new URL, – what, were you expecting something more? You should be buying us presents, you cheap sons of bitches. Now eat yer sliver of birthday cake and enjoy the Single Reviews.

Making their debut this week are Girls Can’t Catch (although Phoebe’s already had some Sloppy Dog coverage, as the one member of X Factor girl group Hope that didn’t look the sort to get fingered in a Chicken Cottage) with Keep Your Head Up, a largely typical Saturdays-esque number unlikely to turn many a head. C-, ladies. Must try harder.

After the trite, ill-conceived smut of If You Seek Amy, Britney Spears continues down the route of self-parody with the frankly trying Radar. Robotic vocals, jittery beats and dizzying repetition, it’s the sound of complacency – perhaps not from the lady herself, but from the horde of faceless puppetmasters. We fear Brit’s going the way of Big Brother – omnipresent, predictable and only enjoyed by the rubbishest of gays.

Next up, our Single of the Week, courtesy of Athlete. The stadium-ready electrofiddling of Superhuman Touch doesn’t so much evoke the 80s as it does Keane’s Perfect Symmetry – one would imagine this wasn’t the intended consequence, but it’s certainly no bad thing. Bright, bracing and beguiling, it’s the perfect way to herald in Album #4.

And bringing the reviews to a close is Pink, with the titular offering from the Funhouse album – annoyingly, an album she’s chosen to sell using some of its weakest tracks. Still, slightly iffy lyrics aside, there’s not a lot to fault in Funhouse as a single, providing an opportunity to display both the attitude and the untouchable rock vocal that makes Pink the pop luminary she’s deservedly become.

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